New and Improved Boy Drama, Featuring Erik Night (Again)! LIMITED TIME ONLY SPECIAL: Untamed Chapter 19

After Heath walks out of Zoey’s life (before he inevitably walks back into it either later in this book or in future instalments), Aphrodite and Zoey head back to the car.

The Casts display their comedy chops by having Darius jump out of the car and ask where the danger is. Oh Darius, love is a kind of danger your strength won’t be able to overcome.

“Is she all right?” Darius asked, glancing in the rearview mirror at me.

“She’ll be okay. Normal ex-boyfriend crap sucks. What happened to her in there was definitely not normal and, well, that double sucks.”

I know vampyres and Imprinting were sort of involved in the breakup drama, but aside from that what was “definitely not normal” about their drama? Girl cheats on boy, boy can feel girl cheating on him because of their Imprint, said Imprint gets painfully broken, boy tells girl he doesn’t want to see her again. CLASSIC.

“So you’re going to be all right?” Darius repeated, this time talking to me.

“If she says no, will you go back and kill that stupid boy?” Aphrodite asked.

A little bubble of laughter escaped from my surprised mouth. “I don’t want him killed, and I’m going to be okay.”

Aphrodite shrugged. “Suit yourself, but I think the boy needs killing.”

I get that Aphrodite is trying to be a good friend here, but this feels a bit extreme given how reasonably Heath behaved and the fact that Zoey’s the one that hurt him. It’s a shame that Aphrodite, who was once our only hope for a voice of reason to cry out in the darkness of these books, is this on board the Zoey train.

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“Honey, would you pull in there to the RadioShack? My stupid iPod Touch has been messing up, and I want to grab a new one.”

RadioShack? What the fuck? When were the last time those words actually came out of anyone’s mouth? This is definitely not the Aphrodite we once knew and loved.

Aphrodite goes into RadioShack, and Darius offers to talk to Heath for Zoey. Darius, you have a kind but stupid heart. It’s also just an opportunity for yet another character to remind Zoey how special she is and thus basic decency doesn’t really apply to her.

“Humans who get involved with vampyres can be overly sensitive,” Darius said, obviously choosing his words carefully. “Being the human consort of a vampyre, especially a powerful High Priestess, is a difficult path.”

“I’m not a vampyre and I’m not a High Priestess,” I said, feeling utterly overwhelmed. “I’m just a fledgling,”

Darius hesitated, obviously wondering how much he should say to me. It was only when Aphrodite got back into the car, clutching her bogus iPod Touch package, that he finally spoke.

“Zoey, you should keep in mind that High Priestesses aren’t born overnight. They begin to come into their own even when they are fledglings. Their power builds early. Your power is building, Priestess. You are far from just a normal fledgling and you always will be. So your actions will have the ability to profoundly affect others.”

This feels like a really forced way to tie these two subjects together. Zoey broke Heath’s heart, Zoey is very special. Oh, actually, when I put it that way it was so seamlessly interwoven.

“You know, I was just starting to get a handle on this ‘wow I’m so different’ thing, and now I feel like I’m drowning in it.”

Aphrodite resituated Maleficent on her lap and then turned in her seat so that she could meet my eyes. “Yeah, being extra-special isn’t as great as you’d think it would be, huh?”

Once again, how does this relate to what just happened between Zoey and Heath? Imagine if Zoey was just an extraordinarily good looking person, not a vampyre, not a priestess, just really freaking hot. So she cheats on her boyfriend and her friends are just like, “That’s the burden of being really really hot.” Well, no, you still could have handled the situation differently.

In fact, in this case I’d argue that it’s not really about Zoey profoundly affecting someone else, but the Imprint had such an affect on her that she couldn’t bring herself to end things with Heath. You could argue they were both victims of Zoey’s power, which caused the Imprint, which contributed to her hurting Heath. Fine. But she still had the choice when it came to Loren, which had nothing to do with how special she was.

Zoey takes stock of her boys (two are dead, one has walked out of her life, and the other is her drama teacher and hates her.) So she is totally done with boys, which means it’s time for her to go to her first drama class with Erik as her professor!

“Just have a seat anywhere, Zoey.” Erik spoke without even glancing in my direction. His voice was brisk and professional and even a little boring.

Tell me more about Erik’s boring voice, book.

Oh no. There’s only a seat available at the front! Zoey’s life couldn’t get any crazier, could it? Wait. There’s a pretty girl in class whose drooling over Erik! Zoey “done with boys” Redbird is jealous as fuuuuck. AND SHE’S GONNA HAVE TO SAVE THE WORLD. HOW MUCH CAN ONE TEEN TAKE???

No! Erik is not my boyfriend anymore. I can’t get pissed when another girl goes after him. I have to ignore it. Maybe I’ll even make a point to try to be her friend to show everybody how over him I am. Yeah, I’ll just—

This girl is looking at Erik, so Zoey’s plan is to befriend her to show everyone she’s over Erik…I hate to say it, but for once Zoey is completely on point.

Shaunee’s boyfriend says hi to Zoey, and Zoey responds in kind, so Erik is like, “Thanks for volunteering, Zoey. You’re going to improv a Shakespeare scene with me! Improving Shakespeare is really unconventional but great because blah blah blah. Stick to the scene but in modern day language! Improv-lite!”

If Erik Night ever talks about something besides Shakespeare the world as we know it will end. Also, WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH BEING A VAMPYRE I STILL DO NOT GET IT.

angry leslie

They are acting out the scene from Othello where Othello confronts Desdemona about her betrayal. This is confusing because Desdemona didn’t actually betray Othello, it was all lies, but Zoey uses this scene to try to explain/apologise to Erik…which makes no sense because she did actually cheat. She thought she and Loren were in love and she cheated. I know he lied to her, I know he was in a position of power, but Zoey was not completely helpless. I want you to remember that when you read her lines during this ridiculous improv scene.

But first, let Zoey recap the plot of Othello for you.

Othello, the Moor (a.k.a. a black guy), had married Desdemona (an extremely white girl). They’d been majorly in love until Iago, a crappy guy jealous of Othello, decided to make it look like Desdemona had been messing around on Othello. Othello had ended up strangling Desdemona. To death.

But was Iago black or white???? Crucial detail missing, Zoey.

Zoey gushes to us about how Erik becomes the character he’s playing and how amazing and talented he is. He even kisses her at the start of the scene, and Zoey immediately realizes she wants to be his girlfriend again. When she told us she was done with boys last time, she was in love with her soul mate Stark. When she told us she was done with boys this time, within a few pages she’s ready to win Erik back. Araghhh.

Erik very easily (almost too easily) embodies a character who is driven by jealousy to kill the woman he loves.

In Zoey’s defence, she does remind herself once that Desdemonda is actually innocent, but then proceeds to improv the scene in a completely different way. This would be fine if she was actually meant to be improving, but Erik told her to keep the scene the same and just make the dialogue modern…Why not just leave those instructions out of the story?

“The truth!” he stormed, his eyes looking wild. “I want you to admit just how much you betrayed me!”

“But I didn’t!” I could feel tears stinging my eyes. “Not in my heart. I never betrayed you in my heart.”

But like yes you absolutely did!!!!!!

Erik’s Othello blotted everything out of my world—Heath, Stark, Loren. There was only him and me and the need I had to try to make him understand that I hadn’t wanted to betray him. That I still didn’t want to betray him.

BUT YES YOU DID!!!! You only don’t want to betray him now because you realized Loren was lying to you! That’s not the same thing!

“Then your heart is a black, shriveled thing, because you absolutely did betray me.”

His hands began to slide from my shoulders up to my neck, and I knew he could feel my pulse that pounded there like a fran-tically fluttering bird. “No! The things I did were mistakes! I broke my own heart, not just one time but three times.”

How creepy is it that Erik is publicly humiliating/punishing Zoey again? He’s chosen a scene where he chokes her to death. I bet you anything he was planning this from the moment she was assigned to his class, not when she said hi to whats-his-face. Also, why must the Casts have teachers behave so inappropriately?

Zoey tried to tell Erik that he was right about the other guy all along and what they had together was a lie.

“It doesn’t have to be too late. Forgive me and give me another chance. Don’t let us end like this.”

I watched as several emotions played across Erik’s face. I could easily see anger and even hatred, but there was also sadness and maybe, just maybe, what looked like hope waiting quietly way back in the warm summer sky blue part of his eyes.

Then all of a sudden the sadness and hope flattened from his expression. “No! You acted like a slut, so now you get a slut’s reward!”

Preeeety sure that’s not a real line from Othello, which means that’s Erik’s modern day interpretation of this scene. Which means he is just as gross as I have believed all along. The phrase “a slut’s reward” belongs nowhere in this world.

With a seriously crazy look in his eyes, he seemed to grow even taller until he towered over me. He stepped close, taking one hand from my throat so that he could use that arm to hold me locked against him. His other hand was big enough that it reached almost all the way around my neck. As he squeezed, our bodies were pressed together, and I felt a wild rush of white-hot desire for him. I knew it was wrong. I knew it was weird, but my heart was pounding with more than fear or nerves. I stared into his eyes, feeling Desdemona’s terror along with my own passion, and I knew by the hardness in his body that he was feeling the same things. He was Othello—crazed with jealousy and anger, but he was also Erik—the guy who had been falling in love with me and had been hurt so badly when he’d found me with another guy.

I don’t think he has an erection, but “hardness in his body” definitely made me pause for a couple minutes.

So Erik is partially Othello/partially himself here…so this is pretty scary. Because as soon as he goes to kill Zoey, she just starts making out with him. Teenage girls everywhere, take note.

Aw man, then the bell rings and the chapter’s over!

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19 comments

  1. AJ Reply

    In response to that magnificently fumbled attempt to tie Zoey’s Cheating Heart to Shakespeare, I can only paraphrase what someone on tumblr once said about Naruto: two people who try to kill each other for whatever reason do not have a healthy relationship whatsoever.

    Confession time: I used to practically idolize a certain, highly polarizing couple from the Naruto fandom. Three things ruined it for me: the other fans’ generally heteronormative reading of the pairing versus my queerplatonic/graysexual view, the condescending attitude said fans sometimes showed toward detractors, and the fact that the two characters involved tried to fucking kill each other at least once in the canon. Yeah, high-school me was pretty put off by that last bit, even as I tried to rationalize it like so much of the pro-SasuSaku fandom did. (I have no idea, man. All I know is I failed hard with that, and for good reason too.) I was pretty emotionally invested in this pairing back then; nowadays I look to it as an example of how NOT to write a romantic relationship. So yeah, my ultimately-shitty-but-could-have-been-better ex-OTP is the reason why I’m slightly obsessed with shitty romance.

    Now excuse me while I go douse my brain in lye to wash away the images of Erik Night with a hard-on.

    • 22aer22 Reply

      I think just because they tried to kill each other once doesn’t mean circumstances around that can’t change. In loads of great shows enemies become friends/fall in love/change or friends become enemies. I can get behind a flawed pairing if I’m on board with the way the story is told, I think. I can’t speak to much about the SasuSaku ship because I never got into Naruto, but I would imagine people’s reading of the relationship was probably more important than the fact that once they tried to kill each other. BUT IDK.
      I think as they stand now, Zoey/Erik is very off-putting even though they have never tried to kill one another. Aphrodite and Zoey used to have a shitty relationship, but now they’re close friends and obviously falling in love!

      • AJ Reply

        You make a very good point! Conflicts certainly wouldn’t be too captivating if enemies stayed enemies and friends stayed friends without variation.

        That said, I previously neglected to mention how SasuSaku was made canon in Naruto. >_< It’s a crazy long story, but the short version is that over the course of the series, SasuSaku morphed into a tragic deconstruction of All Girls Want Bad Boys mixed with Love Martyr, Shoot the Dog, and Sadistic Choice. Yet the penultimate chapter of Naruto handwaved away all of the damage that relationship had sustained in favor of Sasuke playing the Easily Forgiven card, and the following chapter showed them married with a daughter. Supplementary materials released after the manga’s end have yet to show many moments where Sakura and Sasuke work out their previous issues together in a healthy manner, or even where Sakura simply acknowledges that Sasuke sometimes inspires emotions like pain and terror in her. Yep, I know that differences in cultural views on gender and abuse are probably at work here too. Doesn’t really excuse the shoddy, rushed writing in Naruto though.

        Reading about Zoey/Erik (or Zoerik as I’ll now call them) in this chapter was pretty goddamn unsettling. I don’t even see the original characters when I encounter disturbing scenes like this anywhere; the first thing I imagine is Sakura and Sasuke taking everyone’s places. Oh, did I mention that Sasuke actually tried to strangle Sakura in Naruto? Yeah, can you blame me for seeing the analogues here? Oof. I mean, at least in Naruto there was no question that Sasuke had crossed the line when he tried to choke Sakura. It was just the shippers who tried to justify and romanticize it (and sadly, none of the numerous English-language SasuSaku fan blogs I found had a word to say about the unfortunate implications).

        You know what, on second thought, it might have been possible for Zoey to explore her conflicting emotions in this scene. If the Casts were better writers (or if House of Night were written by a different, much more skilled author), maybe this whole scene could have been some kind of subversive exploration of the dynamic between desire and fear, or of the (lack of) agency of intimate abuse victims. I dunno.

        • Jena Reply

          Ugh, now that you’ve mentioned SasuSaku that’s literally all I can see in this Zoey/Erik interaction. It’s even got the creepy “you’re trying to kill me but deep deep down you really love me!” thing going on.

          • AJ Reply

            I laughed at the “you’re trying to kill me but yada yada yada” bit. But seriously, It IS fucking creepy! How so many people can still try to rationalize it, I have no idea. o_o

            Anyway, I’m guessing from your comment that you’re either not a fan of SasuSaku in general or a former shipper who got turned off by the developments/fan reactions?

            • bookbaron Reply

              Sakura and Sasuke’s relationship always bothered me. Especially since it seemed to rapidly deteriorate in Shippuden. And no amount of epilogue exposition is going to make me see their marriage as healthy. Both were resolved to kill the other. I seriously doubt that anything short of a lifetime would mend the amount of emotional damage that caused.

    • bookbaron Reply

      The major difference between Sasuke and Naruto vs Sasuke and Sakura to me would be Sasuke’s level of interest. Sasuke never showed even a basic friendliness with Sakura. He always seemed absolutely uninterested in her; sometimes even repulsed by her.

      This could have been changed if over the course of Shippuden, Sasuke maybe started to notice her in a positive light (not sure how that would be possible since they were always trying to kill each other when they met). Sasuke once gently knocked her out when she confessed her feelings for him. After that, he proceeded to attack her anytime they met. Driving Sakura to the point where she was resolved to murder him first. I actually liked that part of the series since it showed (to me at least) how far Sasuke had fallen. Sakura’s hurt had been molded into a resolve to end him. It was actually perfect. Real mice and men esque. I loved the idea that Sakura was the only one who cared deeply enough about what a terrible monster he had become to kill him. Even Naruto wasn’t willing to make that choice. It was something I deeply respected her for deciding.

      And then she wussed out. The only explanation I could surmise was that the mangaka remembered Sakura was a girl and had girly feelings and couldn’t pull it off.

      I stopped reading after that, if you couldn’t tell.

      I actually gave far more credibility to Sasuke and Naruto because Naruto never gave up on Sasuke. He obstinately was trying to save Sasuke. Even though he fought Sasuke, he wasn’t intending to kill Sasuke (although the same could not be said about the latter). Naruto did admit that they would end up accidentally killing each other if they did fight, but I still stand by the point that Naruto was never intending to kill. He adored and idolized Sasuke. And in some way, Sasuke did grudgingly admire Naruto.

      Course, Sasuke is a deeply problematic character in the first place. He’s a dangerously unbalanced individual who shouldn’t have been invited back into Konoha at all nor been anyone’s romantic partner. He should have been put down like a wild dog because in my eyes, he was beyond redemption. I was hoping that Naruto would come to realize that with how darker Shippuden was getting but instead they went the whole redemption angle which just felt so fake and even somewhat insulting- but whatever.

      Everybody loves Sasuke, yayyyyy. He only murdered and injured and destroyed some of Konoha- lets forgive him everybody! Yay for ignoring war crimes!

  2. Anonymous Reply

    They’d been majorly in love until Iago, the parrot from Aladdin, jealous of Othello….
    Iago was neither black nor white….he was red. Like the colour of Erik’s blood that had stained my hands as i slit his throat, because he was a psycho tool, and that was a psycho tool’s reward.

    • 22aer22 Reply

      I googled the whole line initially, but I didn’t think to isolate the worst part of it…I’m both terrified and intrigued. I’m at such a crossroads!

  3. wordswithhannah Reply

    WTF. WTF!!! Aren’t people watching this? Her classmates? His students??? This is so gross and inappropriate! What the hell kind of teacher was Cast Sr. and what the hell kind of teacher did Cast Jr. wish she had? I need to take about 80 showers now.

    Wait. There’s a pretty girl in class whose drooling over Erik!

    If Zoey was actually any kind of self-aware character, she’d grab that nameless girl by the shoulders and yell “NO! THAT WAY LIES MADNESS!”

    Like you, I think Erik should branch out some in his repertoire. How about some Tom Stoppard? Shake things up a little.

    • Anonymous Reply

      Lol i bet, given the chance, Cast Sr would reinact fifty shades In class.

      And the modern dialogues would be replace with seventeenth century style English. “Oh I say Grey, what a fine grecian specimen you have been endowed with.”
      “Your keen oriental eye is most exquisite Miss Steele. Now i shall proceed to strike your noble behind.”
      Mr. Grey moved with elegance, the air of a fine gentlemen about him as he prepared to strike me…there.

  4. Pingback: The Lazy Reader’s Guide: January 25- January 29, 2016 | Bad Books, Good Times

  5. Cara Reply

    That whole Erik/Zoey scene would be so uncomfortable for the other students in class. Some of them must know that Erik and Zoey dated and broke up, right? So they’d know their teacher was being super weird and just have to watch it play out. Ick.

  6. gasolinespider Reply

    Most. Awkward. Class. Ever. Like, do these students live in a bubble where no one, aside from Zoey and friends, talks about anything that goes on in and outside of school?
    As soon as she leaves the room, people become mannequins, frozen in time and space until she enters hearing range?
    I’m pretty sure Super Special Head of Dark Daughters making out with her ex-boyfriend/new teacher would be a hot topic, Erik using his new position to humiliate/coerce a student notwithstanding.
    (Hello! Months-long lurker, first time commenter. Found this site after looking for some more bad book reviews, having a good time seeing you two slog through this crap series!)

  7. gasolinespider Reply

    I wish Erik stuck to being boring and professional. I know he’s got legit beef, but no need to take it out on the whole class by publiclly humiliating your ex in front of them. “Let me show you how professional I am by making out with a student before berating her, insulting her, and strangling her!”
    Wtf is up with this school hiring creeps as arts and humanities teachers?

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