Beautiful Redemption Chapter 11
Thomas shows up at Liis’ door with coffee. His secretary, Constance, suggested Thomas do so.
“I turned to him, confused. “She’s up early,” I grumbled. “Why would Constance tell you to do this?”
He shrugged. “She thought you might like it if I did.”
I turned to face forward. He was answering me without answering me, my very least favorite thing.
Except he absolutely told you why she told him to do it. I mean, maybe he left out the painfully obvious, “She thought you might like it if I did, and I’m trying to get you to like me even though I just told you I’m still in love with my ex.”
But then he just comes out and says that Constance told him to do it because he’s into her, which leaves Liis flustered. She shouldn’t have complained about wanting him to answer her question properly if she wasn’t ready to handle the blatantly obvious truth.
Thomas asks Liis out, and after a little bit of banter, she agrees. I mean actually agrees, not even the Maddox usual where she says no and Thomas is like, “See you at 8!”
They drive to work together, and Thomas says he’s surprised Liis has been without her car for three weeks. I mention this because soon after, we get this:
I glanced over at him. His transformation from angry, volatile boss to gentle, content neighbor—possibly more—had been gradual, so I hadn’t noticed until we were side by side, the morning sun highlighting the calm in his eyes. We rode the rest of the way to the Bureau in comfortable silence.
His transformation??? He was rude for like one scene!
When they get to the office, Thomas is nice to a co-worker, and Thomas is like, “He knows everything has changed since you came. Now I’m nice to people and ask them about their family!”
Is this really a favourite fantasy among women? To meet a guy that everyone kind of hates, but then suddenly you show up and after three weeks the sun shines out his ass?
“Why is that?” I stared at him, my eyes begging him to say the words.
Admittedly, I was too proud and stubborn to break my vow to the Bureau without insurance. Coffee, odd jobs around my condo, even his hand in mine weren’t enough. I was okay with being second to his job. When we were both committed to the Bureau, it somehow canceled the other out. But I wouldn’t come in third.”
So she wants him to say, “Last night I fell out of love with Cami and in love with you!” At this point, even if he said, “I’m still in love with Cami but falling for you,” which I think is the truth, it would not be a good thing to say. Or maybe Thomas is just shitty at explaining things and he means, “I’ll always love Cami in some way because she was important to me, but I’m not in love with her anymore and want to pursue things with you.”
I’m only saying all this because it’s the same fight the characters have for the rest of the book along with, “But our jobs are important too!”
JUST THEN Trent calls and Thomas has a mysterious conversation with him. He seems really sad, but doesn’t want to talk about it with Liis. Instead, he kisses her! But then he admits that Trent just told him he was going to propose to Cami. So it was a kiss for the wrong reasons.
Liis isn’t mad at Thomas, but she’s mad at herself for her complicated feelings. Because no one cares about work at the FBI apparently, she goes to her office and broods for awhile. That is until Thomas shows up to talk to her. Again, because no one at the FBI works.
The ensuing argument doesn’t make much sense. Liis tries to point out that they can’t be dedicated to their jobs and make a relationship work, but then the fight is also sort of about Cami and Liis’ ex Jackson…existing.
Speaking of Jackson:
“Agent Lindy?” a smooth but high-toned voice came from the hall.
“Yes?” I said, recognizing Constance standing in the doorway.
“You had a visitor downstairs. I brought him up.”
Before I had the chance to wonder who on earth would be visiting, Jackson Schultz walked around Constance and stood in my doorway.
What timing!
Liis paints an unflattering picture of Jackson and makes it really hard to understand why she stayed with him so long.
The longer we had been together, the more his less appealing features and habits had grown noticeable—the way he’d suck food through his teeth after a meal; lean to the side when he passed gas, even in public; or not always wash his hands after he had been in the restroom for half an hour. Even the three deep wrinkles where his skull met his neck made me cringe.
She was with him for like seven years. Either this stuff should have turned her off of him right away because it all sounds pretty gross, or there must have been redeeming qualities about him, but we never get a good explanation of why she was with him for so long.
Thomas makes Jackson wait outside while he and Liis finish up their nonsensical argument:
“We both know you’re too fucked up in there”—I pointed to my own head—“to worry about my ex-fiancé or about me in general.”
“That’s not true.”
“You’re still in love with her!” I said too loud.
Every member of Squad Five present in the squad room leaned forward or back in their chairs to watch through the glass wall of my office. Thomas walked over and lowered the blinds for one section and then the other, and then he shut the door.
THE FBI WITHOUT NETFLIX RETURNS!!!!
He frowned. “What does that have to do with anything? I can’t like you and still love her?”
“Do you? Like me?”
“No, I just asked you on a date because I enjoy being shot down.”
I’m trying to cut Thomas some slack here, but why is this man so awful at making his feelings sound appealing?
They sort of come to an agreement about how to proceed:
“I’m not going to push it. If I get over Camille and you get over your…thing…we’ll reconvene.”
[…]
Thomas pointed to the wall. “Before you, I was a lonely workaholic, and even though you had someone, so were you. But you and I can make this work. It makes complete sense for us to be together. When you tell Mr. Ninja out there to kick rocks, let me know, and I’ll take you to dinner. Then, I’m going to kiss you again and not because I’m distraught.”
It made sense when he said that he was going to get over Camille first before they moved forward, but two seconds later he’s moving forward! Jesus, everybody slow down.
The chapter ends with Liis/myself wondering what the hell just happened.
“Why would Constance tell you to do this?”
He shrugged. “I don’t understand either. Must be one of these weird human mating habits. Maybe she thinks we will blend in better if we act like humans.”
I turned to face forward to process this strange thought.
(…)
“Why is that?” I stared at him.
(…)
He frowned.
… and then they go an a cave tour with Uncle Jeb and learn the meaning of twu wuv or so.
I’ve been rewatching Gilmore Girls lately and coming to the conclusion that all of Rory Gilmore’s boyfriends were terrible (each in their own special way) but I’d rather marry any one of them for life than a Maddox brother for a day.
Is this really a favourite fantasy among women? To meet a guy that everyone kind of hates, but then suddenly you show up and after three weeks the sun shines out his ass?
I think it’s a lot of girl’s fantasy that they can change a guy. Personally not one of mine. Manipulative assholes, no matter how much they turn on the charm, repulse me.
You can’t change someone who doesn’t want to change themselves. Ain’t no force on the universe, ain’t no amount of love that can turn an Maddox into a decent human being.
It’s also a dangerous fantasy where a lot of women stay in domestic abuse situations because they think if they just shower then with more love, things will get better.