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Things Get Sexy Between Patch and Nora: Hush, Hush Chapters 8-11

Matt and I want to free up our Thurs/Fri posts for October, so we can do some super exciting Halloween themed stuff! Thus, we must read many many chapters of Hush, Hush in a short amount of time. It’s going to be hard, it’s not going to be pretty, but it is going to allow us to do something fun in the future that is not this book!

Now, this may mean you won’t get every thrilling moment of this book. I may no longer have the time or desire to tell you what Nora ate for breakfast or remind you that Patch has nice shoulders. In the spirit of organization, I’m going to kind of go back to the old format I used to do with Fifty Shades–a summary of the chapter and then any notable quotes in my little Notes ‘n’ Quotes section.

Chapter 8

Summary 

Nora returns to Elliot and Vee and says that she was able to convince Patch to leave. Elliot goes off to look for Jules, who as Matt has pointed out, absolutely hates the book and its characters just as much as we do!

Nora goes to purchase some cotton candy, but finds herself headed to the Archangel (the most blatantly obvious and terrible symbolism that has appeared in this book yet. Rivaled only by a scene in which Patch told Nora he wanted to give her the nickname “Angel.” That’s Buffy territory, assholes, stay away.)

After spotting a hooded figure watching her, Nora starts to run…straight into Patch! He awkwardly hits on Nora some more, and then convinces her to ride the Archangel with him. He says if she can ride all the way up without screaming, he’ll convince Coach to switch his seat. The stakes could not be higher.

Things actually get kind of bizarre on the ride. Nora notices her seat belt has come undone, and she can’t get Patch’s attention. She goes flying out of the car, and is headed towards the ground, but then suddenly she’s back in the car and the ride is finishing up. It disturbs me that I actually want to know what’s going on. All Patch seems to care about, though, is that Nora screamed, so they will remain bio partners! But seriously, he doesn’t even listen to he while she’s clearly confused and freaked out. Oh, Patch.

Notes ‘n’ Quotes

I find this so odd. Didn’t they just meet in bio a week ago or less?

Oh, I bet he could make you scream, if ya know what I mean, winky wink.

Chapter 9

Summary 

Nora and Patch return to the arcade only to find that Vee, Elliot, and yes, even Jules, are gone. Also, Nora’s phone is mysteriously dead, so she can’t call any of the missing parties. After checking the parking lot and finding Vee and her car are gone, Nora reluctantly accepts a ride home with Patch.

But before that, she makes time to fret over the strange incident on the Archangel. This makes sense, however, her freak-out logic does not:

It was the most terrifying thing I’d ever been though. Almost as terrifying, I was the only one who’d seemed to notice. Not even Patch, who’d been right beside me.

Um, doesn’t she think it would have been pretty impossible to miss if it had actually happened, which clearly it didn’t because she is alive and well. Also, doesn’t she remember that other time she “imagined” something crazy happening? Oh wait she does and her logic still doesn’t make sense?

What if I hadn’t fallen? What if I’d imagined the whole thing? What if I was seeing things that weren’t really happening? First the guy in the ski mask. Now this. I was pretty sure Patch’s mind-speaking was real, but everything else? Not so sure.

And yet somehow this doesn’t seem like enough of a freak-out? And instead of calmly wondering if she’s imagining weird things happening, wouldn’t she just be like, “WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON???” And why is Patch’s mind-speaking the one thing she’s so sure of? God damn it, Nora, stop imagining shit.

Take Our Poll

So Nora and Patch hop on his motorcycle, and he gives her a ride back to her house. Instead of just dropping her off, Patch invites himself inside. Nora lies and tells him Dorothea will be there soon, but Patch aint having none of it.

“Our housekeeper. She’s old–but strong. Very strong.” […]

“Sounds frightening,” he said. […]

“She can clean a toilet inside and out in under a minute. More like terrifying.”

When trying to prove someone’s strength, I can think of no better way than to provide their toilet cleaning stats.

Things get even more wild when Patch and Nora begin to argue about her hair color. Is she brunette? A red head? How many fucks do I give? None.

Then things get even MORE wild when Patch offers Nora a deal. “Help me make tacos, and I’ll answer a few of your questions.” Now, to me this seems like a win/win. Nora gets tacos AND answers. That’s a pretty fucking great scenario right there.

So they make tacos, and afterwards Nora realizes she wants to kiss him. What a shocker!

But then something happens that I have to say I respect. Nora talks about her feelings like a Mature Person. “The truth is, part of me is definitely not comfortable around you…But at the same time I feel a scary attraction to you.” Ignoring the fact that the build-up to this moment has been incredibly dumb, ignoring that this “scary attraction” feels a bit forced (both her fear of Patch and her attraction to him don’t ring true to me), Nora actually comes out and says exactly what’s going on in her head, and damn it, I applaud her for it!

Patch is about to kiss Nora when she thinks, “Not this, not with Patch. He was frightening. In a good way, yes. But also in a bad way. A very bad way.” How does one be frightening in a good way? Is this a Beetle Juice thing? He was kind of creepy, but I think he was generally full of good humor and instigator of joyous shenanigans. At least in the cartoon version. I remember movies and shows incorrectly a lot, oh well.

But then Patch keeps kissing around Nora’s face “gently suckling” (yuck), and Nora tells us, “I was experiencing tingling sensations all through my body, legs included.” It goes without saying he makes her vagina tingle too.

Nora puts a stop to this nonsense. Not one to be deterred, before leaving, Patch reminds Nora about the party the next night (which I have no recollection of him inviting her to in the first place, oops), and she says she might come.

So what do you think, ya’ll, she’s totally going to go right!? Oh wait I still have two more chapters to go before this post is over…so we’ll find out in a minute. Yup, I literally write this as I’m reading the book. Keeps me on my toes!

Notes ‘n’ Quotes

Here are all the sexual references I picked up in this chapter:

-“Is it hard to drive?”

-“…my thighs squeezed around him.”

-“When he pulled out…”

-“Suddenly he was inside.”

-“Tacos?”

-“It didn’t take long to finish…”

Okay, so maybe I took some of those a little bit out of context, but still! It’s all right there in the text.

Chapter 10

Summary

The next morning, Nora is woken by her phone ringing. It’s Vee! A very angry Vee. Nora explains what happened, and Vee counters that they hadn’t left, they were driving around the parking lot trying to find her. As my friend likes to say, “It was a CF.” Communication Failure. Not only was it a CF, I have a feeling it was a Mysterious Communication Failure Caused by Fallen Angels. More commonly referred to as a MCFCBFA.

Because Vee is involved in this scene and she has proven to be the most disturbing character of all, things immediately get weird and gross. Nora admits Patch gave her a ride home, and then this happens:

“Well, I didn’t have much of a choice, did I?” I said tersely. “You left without me.”

“You sound worked up. Really worked up. No, that’s not it. You sound agitated…flustered… aroused.” I could feel her eyes widen. “He kissed  you, didn’t he?”

Like James over in the Fifty Shades universe, Fitzpatrick doesn’t have much of a grasp on how adjectives and dialogue work. For those of you only tuning in for Hush, Hush, very recently in Fifty Shades the male lead said, “Put the chicken in the fridge,” and the female lead told us the way he said it was so hot.

I read Nora’s line aloud a few times, trying to achieve a tone which conveyed agitation and/or arousal. In fact, none of those word choices could really achieve anything but agitation and annoyance. Add in the fact that she’s described as saying this line “tersely”, and the whole thing simply does not translate into arousal. There, the more you know.

Later, Vee and Nora go shopping. To Victoria’s Secret! How hilarious would it be if it turned out Patch worked there too, or he just wandered in? I love when he shows up in unexpected places. It’s so unexpected, so riveting. Makes my vagina tingle, that’s for sure.

So last chapter, Nora was saying how Patch hadn’t even noticed she’d fallen off the Archangel, right? But suddenly she tells us, “The same Patch who saved me from plunging to m death on the Archangel–because that’s what I was sure had happened, although I had zero logical explanations.”

Whaaaa? When did she reach this conclusion that she’s so sure of, and if she’s so sure, why does she then continue giving us possible explanations? “Or maybe, I thought with a chill, I could no longer trust my mind.” DUN DUN DUN!!!

Nora spots a hooded figure watching her while she’s looking at Dream Angels product (foreshadowing?). This time she tells Vee, and Vee suggests it’s Marcie Millar (the bitchy cheerleader). That would be a hilarious twist, come to think of it.

Vee and Nora come up with another one of their brilliant plans. Nora gives Vee her jean jacket and umbrella, Vee leaves the store, and Nora watches as the hooded figure begins to follow Vee. Nora determines that the hooded figure is, in fact, female. This means it really could be Marcie under there!

Nora gets into Vee’s car and starts to drive after them. I’m a bit confused about what happens next, but basically a red object gets thrown at the windshield. Nora gets out of the car, sees its the umbrella she gave to Vee. Then Nora finds Vee on the ground nearby, moaning in pain. Nora calls 911, which is a good call.

Notes ‘n’ Quotes

When I was little, Dorothea’s godson Lionel shattered one of the kitchen glasses. He swept up all the shard of glass except one, and he dared me to lick it. I imagined falling for Patch was a little like licking that shard. I knew it was stupid. I knew I’d get cut. After all these years one thing hadn’t changed: I was still lured by danger.

I’m Nora Grey. I lick glass, motherfuckers.

Chapter 11

Summary

We find out Vee’s arm was broken during the attack, and she needed surgery. I hate Vee, so reading this feels strangely cathartic. More importantly, this means Vee is absent from Biology. Even more importantly, Patch is also missing! This is already promising to be my favorite chapter of the book so far. If only Coach was out and there was a substitute teacher!

Actually, Coach does nothing but hand Nora a note from the new psychologist, Miss Greene, who is taking the place of Nora’s old psychologist.

Take Our Poll

Nora goes to meet Miss Greene. I was initially joking about Miss Greene just being Patch in disguise, but after she begins asking Nora about her life, I’m not so sure.

“Boyfriend?”

“No.”

“You’re an attractive girl. I imagine there must be some interest from the opposite sex.

And then she rips off her mask and reveals herself to be Patch! Then they have sex on the desk, and I am left wondering if I’m reading Fifty Shades again. But really, Nora just gets snippy with Greene, and is all, “I’ve been through this all already, can we move on?”

Then Greene asks about Nora’s tutoring sessions with Patch, then she says she’s setting parameters and doesn’t want Nora meeting with him alone. So I bet this is going to convince Nora to go to the party with him. Yup, I see where this is going.

While on the computer in the library, Nora googles Patch, but comes up with nothing. Then she googles the name of Elliot’s old school and finds this headline: “STUDENT QUESTIONED IN KINGHORN PREP MURDER”. BUM BUM BUM!!!!!

Elliot was questioned about the hanging of Kjirsten Halverson because he was the last person to see her. BUM BUM BUM!

And then Elliot appears behind Nora. But it’s hard to tell if he saw what she was looking at. Then Elliot asks Nora out to dinner in a really menacing way:

“It’s called lying, Nora. Tell her homework is taking longer than expected. Tell her you need another hour at the library. She’s not going to know the difference.”

Elliot’s voice had taken on an edge I’d never heard before. his blue eyes snapped with a newfound coldness, his mouth looked thinner.

He mentions that she went with him to Delphic, so she can’t be too worried about rules. But then he doesn’t at all mention her disappearing. That’s really odd. Oh, Elliot, you seemed so normal at first.

Notes ‘n’ Quotes 

I had a vintage IBM computer at home with dial-up Internet service…

What is it with these books and the female protagonist being like TECHNOLOGY CONFUSE WOMAN! Over in Fifty Shades we have Ana who is supposedly an English major graduating from college who 1) doesn’t own a computer and 2) never had an e-mail address until Christian set one up for her. Buh-whaaaa?

Four chapters. I just read four chapters of this book. I need a drink.

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