If you need a refresher about what’s been going on in the wonderful world of House of Night: Untamed read our last Lazy Reader’s Guide to catch up. I sure needed to re-read it!

Untamed Chapter 13

Right. So Stark died as he was introduced into the plot: abruptly. The Casts really really want us to mourn his death, so the beginning of the this chapter is spent describing, in excruciating detail, how sad Zoey and her friends are over the death of someone they knew for a hot minute.

Zoey even claims that Stark’s dog is shedding real tears, which Google tells me is definitely scientifically impossible and something is very wrong with the dog’s eyes! Although, I guess if this is a world where vampyres exist, so too can the beautiful, mythical tears of a dog.

Jack comforts Duchess:

 Through my tears, I watched Dragon Lankford touch Jack’s back gently. “Take her to your room. I’ll call the vet and get something that will help her sleep. Stay close to her—she is grieving just like a cat will who loses her vampyre. She’s a loyal girl,” Dragon continued sadly. “His loss will be hard for her.”

Ah yes, this statement has quite the sobering effect. Everyone is familiar with the grief a cat feels when her vampyre dies.

Neferet shows up, and she seems pretty excited about Stark’s death. She’s probably relieved that Zoey might be forced to limit herself to two love interests.

Neferet moved to the gurney and folded the blanket back. Everyone else was looking at Stark, but I couldn’t make myself see his dead face, so I didn’t take my eyes from Neferet. I was the only one who saw the flash of triumph and pure, undisguisable joy that radiated from her face. Then she drew a deep breath and turned back into a concerned High Priestess, saddened by the loss of a fledgling.

THAT BITCH IS PLANNING SOMETHING.

Neferet tells Zoey to make sure Duchess is taken care of. What’s your angle, Neferet?

Aphrodite and the twins take Zoey back to Aphrodite’s room so she can enjoy Aphrodite’s fancy shower. Stark just died, and everyone is in so much pain, and yet there are still pages to be dedicated to describing this shower. What I’m trying to say is, the Casts really know how to nail tone.

The Casts also nail true love:

It seemed ridiculous because I’d only known him for what was really only an instant in time, but I felt Stark’s absence like it was a hole in my heart. How could that be? How could I miss him so much when I hadn’t really known him? Or maybe I had known him—maybe there’s something that happens between some people at a level that goes beyond time measurements and what society thinks is proper. Maybe what had happened between Stark and me in those few minutes in the field house had been enough to have our souls recognize each other.

Yeah! Totally! Maybe! Also maybe you’re an idiot and this is the wrong conclusion to jump to? Especially given we’re going to have to spend most of the rest of the chapter hearing about Loren/Erik/Heath and how much you love them too.

When it’s just Aphrodite and Zoey, they discuss whether Stark might come back the way Stevie Rae did. Aphrodite saw him in her vision, but the future is fluid! Suspense!

Also, this:

“How can you not know? You said you recognized him from your vision.”

“I did. I remember his eyes and that sinfully hot mouth of his.”

Am I crazy or is this a really weird/disrespectful way to speak about somebody who just died? I mean, I guess it’s in there for the LULZ courtesy of the Casts and their mastery over tone.

After talking to Aphrodite and brushing off her warnings about how the undead fledglings still seem off, Zoey goes back to her room and tries to call Stevie Rae – to no avail.

So instead of reading “Ink Exchange by my current favorite vamp author, Melissa Marr, but not even her hot fairies could keep my attention from wandering” Zoey re-caps all of her boy drama for us.

I wasn’t over Erik or Heath.

Okay, the truth was I wasn’t over Loren.

No, I wasn’t in love with Loren. What I wasn’t over was the pain he’d caused me. My heart still hurt, and it wasn’t ready to let another guy in.

Except you have just said that Stark might be your soul mate? And that you aren’t over Erik and Heath?

I remembered Stark taking my hand and weaving his fingers through mine and the way his lips had felt against my skin.

“Crap. I guess no one told my heart it wasn’t ready for another guy,” I whispered.

I know teenagers can be dumb, but what the fuck is Zoey talking about?

Zoey decides it’s about time she talk to Heath since their imprint was broken. WHY???? I thought we could just leave Heath behind us and never look back.

The chapter ends with Zoey waiting for Heath to reply to her text…and hearing creepy ravens outside the window who also clearly do not want Heath in this story. Okay, who am I kidding? Heath is hilarious. Bring him back.