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House of Night: Untamed Chapter 20
Last chapter, Erik Night used his very first drama class as a teacher to publicly humiliate, slut shame, and forcibly kiss one of his students by making her act in an improv scene with him that was transparently an excuse to do all the aforementioned things. This is 100% what happened. So how exactly does the student body of the House of Night respond to this?
the class burst into cheers and a chorus of Okie “Whoo-Hoo!” and “That was hawt!”
We try not to attack the authors of the books as much as we attack the books on this blog, but I feel like it’s impossible to ignore that P.C. Cast is a high school teacher in real life. What the fuck kind of high school does she go to where she has been led to believe that this is a realistic reaction that students would have to that?
“Okay, remember to take a look at Julius Casear. Tomorrow we’re improving from that one. And you guys did a good job today.”
What the fuck? Okay, so Erik Night is 1) making his students read a whole Shakespeare play every single day, 2) thus also only spending one class to go over an entire Shakespeare play, 3) in high school, 4) and tells them they all did a good job after only ONE student even did anything all class? So, there’s all that, on top of the “making my student kiss me while I slut shame her in front of the whole class” thing. Holy shit, Erik Night. You are actually the worst teacher ever. You are going to get devoured on Rate My Professor.
Zoey tries to talk to Erik after the other students leave, but Erik tells her to get to her next class and leaves in a huff. So Professor Vampire Erik Night is exactly the same as Student Fledgling Erik Night. Man, it’s almost like just graduating him the second he Changed even though that has no connection with education and maturity was a questionable worldbuilding detail for House of Night.
Well, I knew one thing for sure, even if it was only one thing, and that was that Erik Night was still interested in me.
GIRL. STOP.
Too emotional to go to her next class, Zoey finds herself wandering around the school grounds trying to collect herself. But, lo, she has forgotten that outside is where an unidentified something is threatening her! Apparently.
I yelled at the night. “What do you want?” […] I might be heartbroken about Heath and confused about Stark, and I might not be able to do crap about the mess I’d made with Erik, but I could do something about this.
…can you? It’s literally an unidentified, ambiguously existent threat. That’s like the one thing you can’t do something about, by definition.
Before explaining what the hell this subplot is already, Darius shows up out of nowhere, telling her that she needs to come with him right now to Aphrodite. Zoey realizes this means that Aphrodite is having a vision. The Casts fail incredibly at explaining that Darius has superspeed powers.
Darius exploded forward, somehow taking me with him […] like being on one of those moving sidewalks at the airport
The Casts try again.
like I’d just taken a supersonic ride on a Harley.
The Casts stop while they’re ahead.
…sort of.
“The Sons of Erebus are mighty warriors with vast skills,” [Darius] said cryptically.
“Huh. No kidding?” I was going to say that they also sounded like they should be in a Lord of the Rings movie, but I didn’t want to be rude.
How is that rude? How is the rest of the shit that Zoey is constantly saying not rude?
Zoey goes into Aphrodite’s room, and the Casts get another F minus minus, see me after class for using words to describe things.
Her eyes were completely bloodshot – it was so bad that the whites of them were totally red. Not pink and inflamed […] They were red. As in blood. As in blood filling her eyes and staining them scarlet.
But were her eyes red tho
Aphrodite is clearly shaken from the experience, having just had a vision bad enough to fill her eyes with blood, apparently. Thankfully, Zoey is there to be her friend during this time of need.
“You know, I could smother you with your pillow and no one would miss you.”
Remember, it’s not rude because Zoey didn’t mention Lord of the Rings.
Aphrodite finally gets around to explaining what happened during her vision, and somewhat unusually, she was actually given a prophecy to transcribe. Which, you guessed it, means that it’s time for CAST POETRY.
Ancient one sleeping, waiting to arise
When earth’s power bleeds sacred red
The mark strikes true; Queen Tsi Sgili will devise
He shall be washed from his entombing bedThrough the hand of the dead he is free
Terrible beauty, monstrous sight
Ruled again they shall be
Women shall kneel to his dark mightKalona’s song sounds sweet
As we slaughter with cold heat
Zoey and Aphrodite make no progress dying to decipher the prophecy, and also think the Queen Tsi Sgili part is total bullshit. More importantly, at that moment, Zoey realizes that the poem isn’t written in Aphrodite’s handwriting… but her grandma’s!
According to my Kindle, we’re at 60% of the way through the book! So let’s take stock of what’s happening in the narrative so far and see if we can guess where we’re going for the climax:
- A new character was introduced, and died, but we know he’ll come back because he was in Aphrodite’s vision
- Zoey is being attacked by the night. Literally the night.
- Nuns?
…anybody have any ideas?
The Prophecy just sounds like the arrival of PMS. You’re not pregnant so you bleed red and PMS is washed from It’s entombing bed. “Women will kneel to his dark might.” lol Dude.
So the ending is going to be Zoe getting her period and Because Erik is so “mature”, he’s going to be like “You got your period? I thought you’d be having Loren’s baby by now.”
Btw, Erik just sexually harassed his student on the FIRST DAY and got roaring approval from his students? Now i feel bad for being so hard on poor Loren, at least he lived out his fantasies after class.
I was going to say that [the Sons of Erebus] also sounded like they should be in a Lord of the Rings movie, but I didn’t want to be rude.
Funny that you say that, Zoey. Aren’t the Dark Daughters some rejected baby evildoers from Wheel of Time?
Based on his treatment of Othello, clearly Erik’s class on Julius Caesar will be an excuse for him to shoot one of his students twenty-three times. Guns make it modern you see.
You do NOT want to taste the Kool-Aid they make as part of the “Romeo and Juliet” project.
Loren looks like Professor Lupin compared to Erik Night. WOW.
I like the juxtaposition between the casual insanity and incompetence of House of Night and the over-explained nonsense and preaching of Left Behind. Both are SHIT, but they have variety in their shittyness.
“Variety in the shittyness” is like our theme song over here
That needs to be the tagline of your blog.
Her eyes were completely bloodshot – it was so bad that the whites of them were totally red. Not pink and inflamed […] They were red. As in blood. As in blood filling her eyes and staining them scarlet.
There was blood. Like, a lot blood. So much blood. Blood everywhere. Super-gross, bright red blood. From her body. Plasma and red cells and white cells bound up together in a bodily fluid that was no longer in her body. Known as blood. Blood was present.
The writing horrifies me, but not for the reasons the authors hoped.
“The Sons of Erebus are mighty warriors with vast skills,” [Darius] said cryptically.
“Huh. No kidding?” I was going to say that they also sounded like they should be in a Lord of the Rings movie, but I didn’t want to be rude.
Excuse me Zoey, aren’t you the one dropping references to Nyx and the Dark Daughters every five seconds? To anyone not versed in your vampire lingo that sounds just as fake.
As a continuation of my comment on the post right before this (re: Erik/Zoey): ????????
So that poem structure is:
ABCAB
ABAB
AA
… whut.