Happy Birthday, Matthew!

25 years and one day ago, Matthew was born into this chaotic world. A world led astray by books like Fifty Shades of Grey and Bared to You. A prophecy foretold that someday Matthew would try to make sense of this crazy world and blog about bad books because nothing important can ever happen without a prophecy being involved. We honour this special occasion with two days off the blog AS THE PROPHECY FORETOLD.  You can’t argue with this shit, guys.

We’ll return Thursday/Friday with our regularly scheduled programming, which mainly consists of Zoey Redbird being a fucking moron and/or leading a ritual for Nyx knows what reason.




  1. Skylar Reply

    Ah gosh, did this make me laugh xD. Loved the prophecy.

    Happy birthday! And have a happy two days off! I thought if you read anymore without a break, you’d end up dead. Well, undead dead that is actually dead but not really and [insert more zosplaining].

  2. Jennifer Layton Reply

    Have a wonderful birthday, Matthew. I wish I had known because I stumbled across the perfect gag gift for you yesterday. I went into a drugstore to buy some nail polish and wound up staring at a box of something called Nix, which is one letter off from Zoey’s Goddess of Mental Instability. It’s a product that kills head lice.

    Enjoy your cake!

  3. E.H.Taylor Reply

    Happy quarter-of-a-century birthday! May you receive many blessings from Nyx, be stalked by a billionaire, and explore many caves – or just the same one over and over again!

  4. Madeline Reply

    Happy birthday! May the prophecy not end with you being marked by a vampire or fighting the Maddox brothers in the ultimate battle!


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